On Call

I am a 21st century woman. I embrace all of the gadgets and devices that make modern life more convenient. My fireplace comes on with the flick of a switch. My garage door opens magically when I turn into my driveway. My dishwasher is currently doing my dishes, so I can sit here and blog guilt-free. I even have a facebook page.
But lately, I can't help wondering if all our bells and whistles are a blessing or a curse.
Recently, my daughter broke up with her boyfriend. Soon after, she started getting texts from strange people, giving her their two cents on how she should handle her love life. Some were just annoying, while others were downright rude! Then she got phone calls from a "withheld" number. The person wouldn't talk, just made weird noises or played recorded bits of voices from tv shows. And her email password stopped working. Things she'd emailed friends were suddenly known to her ex - with no explanation of how he knew.
Unsettling.
Scary.
As my husband and I took the necessary steps to find out what was going on and protect our child, we mused about how it came to this. Are kids really different these days? Maybe the rules of relationships we grew up with don't apply anymore?
Kids haven't changed. But technology has. Teenagers have always craved communication, but it hasn't always been so easy. We didn't text each other constantly, but we did write letters to each other during class. At home, phone time was limited because you were "tying up the line." If a boyfriend wanted to call me, he had to risk my dad answering the phone. Once, a boy prank called our house, saying in a breathless voice, "I want your bod!" He didn't know my mom was listening in. He soon found out! To this day, mom doesn't let me forget that phone call. (Thanks a lot, Jeff!)
My husband and I have been carried along with the rest of America on the technology wave. We went from two "parent-only" phones, to four nationwide, unlimited text, blackberry, blue-toothed phones.
And now, each of us is unequivocally available.
Comforting when Parker calls from the neighbor's backyard to tell me he'll be playing inside their house. Not so comforting when I see texts on his phone from a girl, asking at 11:00 at night if he's still awake cause she can't sleep. Should kids really be able to say whatever, whenever, with no fear of consequences?
And therein lies the real issue. Good parenting requires constant awareness. Whether it's intercepting letters via "snail mail" or collecting cell phones every night at bedtime, it's my job as a mom to know my kids...who they are, who they talk to, where they go. Ironically, with all the ways to check up and check in, a good, old-fashioned, open, healthy parent-child relationship is still the best way to keep them safe. Parenthood is a full-time job. And I'm happy to be on call.